Thursday, October 8, 2009

Is it ok to have my groomsmen wear Breast Cancer at a ties at my wedding


Is it ok to have my groomsmen wear Breast Cancer at a ties at my wedding?
My fiancé's mother died of breast cancer. I was thinking of having the groomsmen wear breast cancer awareness ties with their suits. He has two brothers in the wedding party. Do you think this might offend some of his family members, including his brothers?
Weddings - 21 Answers
Random Answers, Critics, Comments, Opinions :
1 :
No, I think it's a great idea, that's very considerate
2 :
Why wouldn't it be okay? Of course it's okay and who cares if he offends someone.
3 :
Why would they be offended? I think it's a great idea. You could talk to them and make sure they are comfortable with it though.
4 :
I think you should let the groom make the decision.
5 :
Thats a great idea. Make sure he is ok with it and if he is, do it. That makes the wedding even more special.
6 :
that is a very sweet and thoughtful gesture :)
7 :
I think the best person to ask this question to is your fiance! I personally think its a great idea and I would imagine that his brothers would be touched by this but weddings can be touchy for a groom/bride who have lost a parent! Ask your fiance before making a decision and tell him that you are doing it to honor his mother! Happy wedding!
8 :
I think that is a wonderful idea! I don't think anyone would be offend by that.
9 :
Offend, no... but it could bring back painful memories on what's supposed to be a happy day. But really, this is something you ought to be asking your fiance... he would know his brothers better than anyone here. When my sister and her fiance had the same issue when they got married. His mother had died some years before, and they decided that they would leave an empty seat in the front row (where she would have been seated had she been there) and have a single rose on the seat in her memory.
10 :
Nice and classy sentiment.
11 :
I'd steer clear of this. For one thing, your wedding really isn't the place to do something like this. For another, believe it or not, many Stage IV (metastatic) breast cancer patients hate anything with a pink ribbon in it. It's very controversial, for reasons that are too complex to explain. I learned this when I joined a listserve about 4 years ago on behalf of my aunt, who had been diagnosed and needed some questions answered.
12 :
I think it would be an amazing idea. It shows how your love and respect and awareness of how serious the problem is. I'm actually doing the avon walk for breast cancer :)
13 :
You decide the attire. You call the shots. Go for it. I'm all for this, but do not make it a pink ribbon fund raising or awareness agenda, it's a wedding, a happy moment, ya know. Good luck
14 :
Honestly, I think it might depress some people. The last thing I want to think about at a wedding is my deceased loved ones...especially someone so close. This will not only make them think about her, but also think about the details of how she died. It's nice that you want to make a gesture, but I'd play it safe and avoid it. Everyone handles death differently, and there are sure to be at least a few people who wouldn't appreciate this.
15 :
Ask fiance, know you want to honor her, but to me this would only bring memories of a sad time and remind everyone of her absence which they will already be thinking of anyway. I personally think this would take away from the happiness of the wedding. The focus of the wedding is on you and groom to be. Do not do this, have a pink memory candle or something like that, but that's all. I would not want to be reminded of my Mother's suffering at my wedding. She would be in my mind and heart enough anyway. Mines been gone 25 years and it still hurts. I am so glad that she got to see me have the wedding she never had. Everyone will be emotional enough anyway and if you have not lost a parent, you will not know how they feel. Best opinion, you're asking----Big No.
16 :
I think that would be lovely, with a pink rose or carnation in the lapel... presuming the guys are okay with it and feel it an appropriate tribute to their mother. Also, instead of wedding favors, you could put notes on the tables that in lieu of favors you have donated $1 or $2 or $5 (or whatever) per guest to the Susan B Komen foundation to help fight the disease. What's with the thumbs down? Donating to charity instead of giving out el-cheapo favors no one wants is a new trend. Where you folks been?
17 :
That sounds like a lovely idea :)
18 :
My mother had Breast Cancer also. I think it would be a wonderful tribute to her brave fight. Also you might consider having a special pink floral arrangement with ribbon at the Church just for his mother.
19 :
If the groom and his brothers are happy to do so, then do it. Otherwise, don't. Don't worry about other family members, but keep in mind that if there are other attendees that have had (or are currently being treated for) breast cancer, they may not appreciate it. There are other ways of honoring his mother than focusing on the disease that killed her at his wedding.
20 :
No, I think on the contrary they would be very touched that you thought of that (and the rest of his mom's family). I think its a very nice sentiment myself! I'm doing "diabetes awareness" ribbons, on the groomsmen tuxes (or considering it) and on the favors at the tables, for my dad. My dad died from diabetes complications.
21 :
Of course, that is a great way to bring her into the ceremony



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