Tuesday, June 12, 2012

What is it like to know someone with breast cancer


What is it like to know someone with breast cancer?
i just found out that my friend's mom has breast cancer. i really want to help her through this whole thing so i was just wondering what to expect. like what's going to happen to her mom? will she have to like stay in the hospital all the time? i never knew anyone with cancer before so i don't really know what's going to happen. any help?
Cancer - 3 Answers
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1 :
It really depends on the person and what stage she has. My mother had breast cancer when I was a teenager. She had to have a mastectomy. That means they removed the breast. Everyone was worried, but she actually handled it pretty well. I've heard that some women get very depressed. Hormones can be a big issue and it is very painful. My mom lived through it and has been in remission for 31 years. I also have a friend now that found a lump in her thigh. Within only a few weeks it became the size of a softball. She had emergency surgery and it turned out to be a very aggressive cancer. She had to have chemo for over a year. She lost her hair, had very little energy and got physically sick often. We have common friends and we all get together to spend time with her. We take her out when she feels like going. We stay home and cook dinner like a small party and just hang out with her. There have been many times she was too sick to go home, so we fluffed up some pillows on the sofa, let her rest and covered her with blankets to make her comfortable... then we all talked about silly things to make her laugh and take her mind off the pain. We offer her to spend the night so she won't be alone. She has gorgeous hair, but when she lost it, we all showed up at her house to BBQ for her and clean house for her. We all wore flesh colored swim caps so that we wouldn't appear to have hair either. She laughed until she cried. It's hard to know what to say or do... but just be a good friend to her. Be there for her, listen to her. With her mom being so sick, she will have moments where she might cry, she might be stressed or scared... and she might be very strong. Maybe you can offer to go with her to the hospital when they go... to be there for support. Let her vent if she needs to. Let her cry if she needs to. Just hug her and be supportive. Bring her mother flowers, offer to help both of them around the house. You can be useful in a time when the whole family is struggling. Anything to pick up the slack when their concentration is elsewhere. Be kind and sensitive. Listen to your heart and good sense. God bless you! I'll keep you all in my prayers.
2 :
A person with breast cancer is just like anyone else. She will probably have a surgery and then maybe have chemotherapy (treatment with powerful intravenous drugs to kill the cancer) and radiation treatment (powerful radiation like X-rays that also kill cancer cells). She probably won't spend much time in the hospital. I had my surgery and went home the same day. Some days she will feel fine, other days she will be tired or feel sick from treatment or will be recovering from surgery. If she has chemotherapy, she will probably lose her hair (it does grow back). I was diagnosed 6 months ago. I go out with friends, walk my dog and have continued working part time.Your friend's mom will probably keep doing a lot of the things she normally does, just at a slower pace till she feels better. And treatment keeps you very busy too. Be supportive of her and your friend. A nice thing to do is cook a meal for the family once in awhile, especially something they can freeze. When you are treatment, you sometimes don't feel well, don't feel like cooking an it helps just to have something easy that you can heat up. A lot of people drove me to treatment and cooked for me and my husband. That was a lot of help.
3 :
My wife went through breast cancer treatment and it is difficult at best. Lots of times she will be pretty fatigued if she will be going through chemotherapy or radiation treatments. It is kind of you to be concerned if I were a guy that I had a friend who's mom was going through treatment and wanted to help I would volunteer to do things for your friend and mom. It could be as simple as doing some house chores or yard work. What happens is that their mom is so tired that she cannot do much around the house. Her main job now is to survive cancer period. So I would ask if there would be anything they need. It could be as simple as driving them to the appointments or mowing the grass, or doing the windows. You are a good friend, but usually it would need to be a good relationship with the mother for the offer to be considered because it is such a private disease. Your friend will be under a lot of pressure to step up and take on more responsibility around the house. Anything to relive that would likely be a blessing. Angels come in many forms to help, and you are one.



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